It’s been a week since my band won an Independent Music Award for 2018’s Best Pop Album out of all independent releases from last year. I have been searching myself to try and find the words to say - how to respond to all my friends and family asking me how I feel.
And well, I feel... amazing. Hungry for more. Humbled by the honor. Thankful for my support system that got me here. A little tired. Motivated beyond belief. This industry I’ve found my passion tied to is really unforgiving. People don’t really see the behind the scenes - the amount of memories I’ve lost to practice, travel, recording and writing is kinda sad actually. I gave up my nights and sleep a long time ago. That’s just part of the trade. And yeah you love what you do, but it’s hard not to listen when you’re constantly being bombarded by thoughts of “is it worth it?” And to be honest, a lot of times it really isn’t.
It’s exhausting. We play to a lot of empty rooms. Playlist curators SHIT on your art with no tact and let you know just how insignificant and worthless you are. BUT. And it’s a big but - last week I fucking won. It’s one thing to have friends, family and fans believe in you. And trust me, that’s the only thing that’s kept me going as long as I have. But to get an industry mandated award, well it is everything to me.
It’s my validation - confirmation that I’m on the right path. Just to not give up. Everything I’ve done, everything I’ve lost, it came together in a piece of work that was regarded as SIGNIFICANT. Thank you to every single person who’s ever just listened to a song or posted about it on their story. Even in the beginning. I was just a kid singing The Rainbow Connection in the 2nd grade talent show at one point, and now I’m an award winning composer, producer, singer and instrumentalist. Dare to fucking dream. Set yourself to something and don’t let anyone else stop you. It really can be done.
I love this band, I love this music, and I am just so unbelievably thankful for everything and everyone. Thank you for celebrating with me and my successes, thank you for picking me up when I’m deep on the other end. Fuck. I won. I really did it. Thank you. I hate saying that it’s only the beginning because it’s sort of a cliche, but yeah. It’s only the beginning. Strap in. BETWEEN. GIANTS. ▲•▼